Cloud

cloud

by Andy Gyoyo Sensei

My mother is an artist and sees the world through her unique perspective. She looks at seemingly disparate patterns and challenges us to see what she sees… “See that cloud? What do you see?” Quite frankly, I never see what she sees and often I see no pattern at all so I’ve learned to immediately ask what she sees- so I can know the right answer. But in one book, Thich Nhat Hahn asks if we can see the cloud in the paper from which we are reading- not in the abstract or spiritual sense but in the sense that without clouds and rain there would be no trees, and without trees there would be no paper. So, the cloud is in- or inseparable- from the paper. Over the years, I’ve tried to mediate about this interdependence- or the contingent nature of things as Batchelor-sensei would phrase it. So, my morning musings have expanded in the following manner when I contemplate things as they inter-are.

In the paper is the cloud

In the rock is the cloud

In the rose is the cloud

In Andy is the cloud

These expansions were added gradually as I came to see clouds in the inanimate, in living things, and in me. Without clouds, none would exist- though in different ways. Water is throughout me- no water, no Andy. No water, no rose to bloom. And the rock? Well, likely not much water within it- but the rock that I saw in my garden next to the rose was shaped over eons by water (and other rocks, etc.) to have its smooth surface- no cloud, no rain, no rock.

It seemed reasonably complete until the day I was simply absorbed in the clouds above and thought about ‘What’s in the cloud?” Well, first, it is empty- empty of itself. There is no cloud in the cloud. The cloud is made- is contingent upon- non-cloud elements. Trees give off oxygen and other gases that help form the cloud- so too does the rose bush. And bits of the rock fall/float/disipate off the rock and become part of the particulates around which water vapor coalesces to form droplets- to form clouds. And, of course, my breath mingles in the air and merges with clouds continuously- so Andy is in the clouds. For me, this is not a spiritual discussion- we’re talking about reality. So,…

In the cloud, there is no cloud- the cloud is made of non-cloud elements.

In the cloud is Andy

In the cloud is the rose

In the cloud is the rock

In the cloud is the paper

So whether you look up or down, in front or behind, everything contingently is.

 

Andy Gyoyo Bondy is Lay Minister for Bright Dawn Way of Oneness

Starling

By Marilyn Chiyo Robinson

 

gassho

I will confess to you that I have a history of difficulty holding my hands together in gassho.  To gassho, by putting the palms of both hands together in front of one’s heart, is the highest form of respect symbolizing Oneness.  For me, the gesture never felt authentic, like I was an imposter, awkward in the movement, a stand-out convert who was not raised in the tradition.  Among other things, this is a story about gassho.

Our youngest daughter spent every spring on what my husband and I called “starling patrols” around our neighborhood. This ritual consisted of walking up and down the sidewalks trying to find and rescue a baby bird before the local cats found it.  More than one creature in its death throes has made its way to our home cradled in her t-shirt.  None has survived.

Starlings are known locally as trash birds for their fondness of grain in our agricultural area and impressive reproductive abilities.  But to our daughter, they are wondrous creatures that she watches intently as herds of them mow our lawn for food each morning.  I might add that our daughter is a special child.  She is a continual reminder in my life of the beauty of simple kindness.

3047_Sibl_9780307957900_art_r1So it was not surprising then, now a year and a half ago, upon arriving home from my book club that my daughter announced she had rescued yet another starling.  It was tucked in a box on a towel and put in the shop for the night.  And so began her pleading “please mommy, can I keep her?  I’ve never had a pet of my own, please, please?”

Brief aside here in our defense – we have two dogs, a parrot, hermit crabs, fish and a toad.  It is true that none of the pets is exclusively this daughter’s, but they all benefit from her loving attention.  So, sure, we felt a little guilty, but not enough to acquire another responsibility.  You know when the last one is the last one, right?

Early the next morning, our eldest daughter and I went to the shop to check out the bird.  Sure enough, it was a starling, maybe two weeks old, lying on its side with its neck flopping over.  Its heart was still beating.  “Swell” I thought.  At least it would not die alone.  

I gently lifted the tiny bird from the towel, cupping it in the length of one hand.  As I stood up, I placed my other hand over it for support while carefully taking it into the house.  That’s when it struck me – my hands were in the gassho position with a beating heart inside.  In that moment, I felt compassion well up inside me.  I really saw the starling for the first time.  This creature had given me a gift.

starlingWe are now 1 ½ years down the road from that bright dawn morning.  I will spare you the details.  But I would like to announce the addition to our family of our youngest child’s new pet whom she named Olivia, but who has since become Oliver.  Oliver is imprinted on me, which is to be expected after nursing him to health hourly for most of his early residence with us.  He lives in a large cage given to us by the amused veterinarian who de-wormed him

Oliver has learned to talk, loves to splash in his bath tub and eats like a, well, starling. But our daughter loves him and visibly glows with pride as she watches his antics.

I know now that one doesn’t really know when the last one is the last one.  I suppose it helps to approach life as full of surprises. When we are open to all possibilities, we unconsciously invite the Dharma to enter our lives.

Best of all, for me, gassho will always hold a beating heart.  

I gassho to each of you.   May your days be full of Bright Dawn moments.

 

 

 

This Dharma Glimpse and many other can be found in our Bright Dawn Dharma Glimpses book. You can order one here.  You can also learn about the Bright Dawn Center, links to services, resources and the Lay Ministry Program. 

 

Hunting the Great Awakened Elephant

 Olivia-Knapp-Elephant-Drawing

Dharma Glimpse – April 6, 2014 by  Wendy Shinyo Haylett

Dedication to a spiritual path is a treacherous activity and dedication to a path as a Dharma teacher is ever more treacherous. The innate hazards of attaching to our egos and our self-power as our refuge is ever-present and proportionate to our desire to attain the “end” we have set our sights on … whatever that “end” may be: Dedicated practitioner, teacher, Enlightenment, rebirth in the Pure Land … or whatever.

In the past two months I’ve been involved in two activities for the Bright Dawn Center, one was researching and writing an article about Rev. Gyomay Kubose, Rev. Koyo Kubose, and the Bright Dawn Center of Oneness Buddhism, which recently published in the Amida Order journal, Running Tide. The other was facilitating a sutra study module for the Lay Ministry 6 Class of 2014, focusing on the Tan Butsu Ge and The Heart Sutra translations and commentaries by Rev. Gyomay Kubose.

I have been immersed in the spiritual, philosophical, and teaching history of our Bright Dawn lineage … rereading teachings, exploring lineage teachers, listening to Dharma talks, and, well… something wonderful has happened. I know Rev. Koyo Kubose’s saying is “the Dharma is my rock” but what I have recently experienced is more of the feeling of floating. Immersed in our lineage teachings, I found myself suddenly more buoyant in life, in all aspects of my life. Not like a rock anchoring me, but a natural ability to float. Not a drowning in the details of life, but a floating above.

I felt like I had become one with me, for the first time in many years. Like I was naturally me. I began enjoying every part of my life. I was floating through work, through stress, through chores … even through the endless snow shoveling and cold of the winter of our discontent.  I wasn’t worried about what I should be doing or how I should be acting. I was just living my life, being with my friends, family, co-workers, and clients, but feeling more authentically myself, connected to a natural flow in everything I did, and at ease.

Everything seemed so natural, so free. It reminded me of Dharma song that first captivated me some 25 years ago when I was studying and practicing in the Tibetan Buddhist tradition. It is called Free and Easy: A Spontaneous Vajra Song by Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche.

 

Free and Easy: A Spontaneous Vajra Song

By Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche

Happiness cannot be found
through great effort and willpower,
but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go.

Don’t strain yourself,
there is nothing to do or undo.
Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind
has no real importance at all,
has little reality whatsoever.
Why identify with, and become attached to it,
passing judgment upon it and ourselves?

Far better to simply
let the entire game happen on its own,
springing up and falling back like waves
without changing or manipulating anything
and notice how everything vanishes and
reappears, magically, again and again,
time without end.

Only our searching for happiness
prevents us from seeing it.
It’s like a vivid rainbow which you pursue without ever catching,
or a dog chasing its own tail.

Although peace and happiness do not exist
as an actual thing or place,
it is always available
and accompanies you every instant.

Don’t believe in the reality
of good and bad experiences;
they are like today’s ephemeral weather,
like rainbows in the sky.

Wanting to grasp the ungraspable,
you exhaust yourself in vain.
As soon as you open and relax this tight fist of grasping,
infinite space is there—open, inviting and comfortable.

Make use of this spaciousness, this freedom and natural ease.
Don’t search any further.
Don’t go into the tangled jungle
looking for the great awakened elephant,
who is already resting quietly at home
in front of your own hearth.

Nothing to do or undo,
nothing to force,
nothing to want,
and nothing missing—

Emaho! Marvelous!
Everything happens by itself.

 

So there it was, a profound and beautiful Dharma song that I didn’t really hear. And it was only in my rediscovery of the riches and power of our Bright Dawn lineage teachers and teachings that I felt this freedom and natural ease. One of the books I have been rereading is the essay collection by Dr. Alfred Bloom Sensei, Living in Amida’s Universal Vow.

Reading that I kept coming back to the first essay by the great reformer in our Bright Dawn Center lineage, Kiyazawa Manshi, “The Great Path of Absolute Other Power and My Faith.” In this essay he talks about his quest to find “the meaning of life at all costs.” It is this quest that brought him to his belief in the Tathagata.

He describes something I believe many of us can relate to, because we have struggled with the same thing. I know I certainly can. He talks about the journey he took to his faith and his belief that self-power is absolutely useless. He said it had been a trying process and he could only reach that conclusion of the uselessness of self-power when he exhausted the entire resources of his knowledge and devices.

He would reach conclusion after conclusion of what the meaning was, then each one would be invariably undermined. As he wrote: “One can never escape this calamity so long as one is hopeful of establishing religious faith by way of logic or learning.”

My recent Bright Dawn immersion experience has brought me, too, to that place Manshi Sensei hinted at; the place where all your previous conclusions about the meaning of life are undermined. They are undermined because they were formed based on logic or learning alone.

I can’t tell you how many times during my life as a spiritual seeker, I have reached that place where I look back and laugh—

out of frustration—laugh because I see I have been traveling for miles and miles, months and months, and sometimes years and years, heading in the wrong direction.

Now what? Now what do I have to learn to get myself oriented and walking in the right direction toward Enlightenment or whatever it is I’m seeking?

Each time I reach that place, I come closer and closer to the discovery that it’s not what I have to learn or acquire, but what I must unlearn and give up.

But to be student, one must learn, right? And there is the rub. That is the treacherous territory of being a student of Buddhism or any true spirituality or religion, and the heightened danger of being a teacher on the same path.

It was Shinran who realized in his own life that the path is not so much about Enlightenment or being reborn in the Pure Land, but about the awakening of faith and a naturalness, or “Amida’s Sincerity.” This awakening of faith is described by Kaneko Daiei, a student of Manshi Sensei, in his essay, “The Meaning of Salvation in the Doctrine of Pure Land Buddhism” also in the book Living in Amida’s Universal Vow.

He describes it as “breaking through at the root of delusion.” When that happens, he writes, we are broken, our self-complacency and our faith in self power, logic, and concepts is shaken.  He says “we are emptied through and through” yet “at the same moment we find ourselves taken in by Amida’s Sincerity” and “for the first time attain true restfulness, because our deepest root of our existential anxiety or suffering, namely ignorance, is cut through forever.”

Of course this doesn’t mean that we won’t experience suffering as long as we remain in the world, but he says “they no longer disturb the fundamental restfulness and serenity.”

All this circles back to what Rev. Gyomay Kubose teaches in so many of his essays in Everyday Suchness and Everyday Suchness. Reread for yourself the essays “Naturalness”, “Living Life”, “Life without Regret”, “Buddhism is Everyday Life”, “Simplicity”. “The Natural Way”, “Gateless Gate”, and “Transcending Means and Ends”, to name a few.

Yes, I have been a student of these teachings … constantly whispering in my ear … while I was still trying to be student, trying to be a teacher, hunting that illusive “self” or lack of self I thought I needed to find, and trying to go wherever I thought I needed to go to find it.

I was listening, but I wasn’t hearing. I wasn’t actually living my life. I was doing what I thought I should to reach the goal of … of … what? Hunting the great awakened elephant!

Running away from myself, looking beyond my own life to find it. I hadn’t emptied myself through and through. No, instead, I had been loading myself up with elephant-hunting gear and elephant-hunting instructions and books. I was collecting that gear from every teacher and it was weighing me down until I was lost and spinning, not knowing what direction I was heading.

Had I listened deeply—not mouthing the words to be a model student or give the right teachings—but listened in me, for me, I would have heard. I would have heard that Enlightenment is everyday … that acceptance is transcendence … that ends = means. And that only in emptying myself, releasing me from the tight grasp of me, that I can truly live as me.

Had I truly listened, I would have heard Rev. Gyomay Kubose saying to me “Only when one lives his life does he know its meaning.” I would have heard him say, “Whatever the true inner heart says is the right way. Listen to its voice.” I would heard him say the true way “is simply the natural way.” I would have heard him say that “the true self is selflessness” … the teaching of “forget yourself.”

And I would have heard the voice of Rev. Akegarasu, as Shuichi Maida wrote in Heard By Me. He wrote, “Rev. Akegarasu is always whispering in my ear, ‘There is nothing to worry about. You had better do whatever you want to do.’ This is the Buddha-Dharma I heard from him.”

 

_/|\_ A deep Gassho to our precious teachers.